God is not…..

The following is adapted from a post on http://randyneff.com

God is not:

– mad at you

– out to “get” you / out to spoil your fun

– punishing you

– a prude (he actually invented sex)

– Santa Clause

– a killjoy

– religious

– fixated on your failings / waiting for you to screw up again / eager to pounce on you

– contained in a book

– found only in a church building

– opposed to science (he invented that, too)

– unaware of you /unaware of your suffering

– ignoring you

– caught off guard

– a tree / a mountain / the ocean / the earth

– a man / a woman

– a cow

– unavailable

– surprised by your doubts /afraid of your doubts / threatened by your questions / offended by your disbelief

– indebted to you / obligated to you / holding a grudge against you / toying with you

– cold / aloof /deaf/  distant / dead

– pinning you under his thumb

– hating you because you’re gay, a drunk, divorced, addicted …

– disgusted with you

– the one who gave you AIDS / the one who gave you cancer

– hostile to art (another thing he invented)

– a democrat / a republican / a liberal / a conservative / a socialist / a capitalist / a union member /a hawk / a dove

– lacking a sense of humor (pretty sure he invented that, too)

– counting your sins /  fixated on your flaws / rubbing your nose in your mistakes / watching to catch you in the act

– a Baptist, a Presbyterian, a Catholic, a Pentecostal, a Hindu, a Muslim, a Buddhist, a Methodist, a Church of Christ member, a Lutheran, an atheist (who knew?), an agnostic  …

– a feminist /  a chauvinist / outdated

– out of touch

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